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Still Pissed

by Apocalypse Tourism

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1.
Down Bad (Oh Fuck) 03:45
lyrics
Oh shit, oh fuck I'm stuck on you Oh shit, oh fuck What do I do The pining hits hard Every time you up and cross my mind Which tends to be a lot I really fell this time Oh shit, oh fuck I'm infatuated Oh shit, oh fuck Don't get why you waited The pining hits hard Every time we're in the same room Been waiting far too long To get a piece of you It's hopeless, I'm desperate I want you near cuz I'm yearning and I'm falling I want you here I would give anything to have you right here in my arms Protect you from the world, I'll keep you safe from harm Oh shit, oh fuck I'm down bad Oh shit, oh fuck Biggest crush I ever had The pining hits hard Every time you I see your smile So if I get down on my knees Can I worship for a while? It's hopeless, I'm desperate I want you bad cuz I'm yearning and I'm falling So so bad I would give anything to have you right here in my bed Get close to you, you get close too, and then I'll give you head It's hopeless, I'm desperate I need you baby cuz I'm yearning and I'm falling Please don't give me a maybe I would give anything to hear you say you love me, so I would know You'll be here for me, and cherish me, even when I fall
2.
Still Pissed (Rent Song) 03:27
lyrics
I'm still pissed you ended it on a whim And I'm still pissed you never helped with the rent And I'm still pissed you were such an asshole the whole time Yeah, I'm still pissed that you're gone and you're not mine Go fuck yourself, please come back Wait no, not like that It's just another yelling match You'd think I'd be accustomed by now Go fuck yourself, wait I'm sorry Shame me and my fucking body Go fuck yourself But don't leave me Betrayal as far as I can see I'm still pissed about those times you called me a whore Yeah, I'm still pissed I came back for more And I'm still pissed you used me in every way I'm still pissed, that I miss you every day Go fuck yourself, wait come back I promise I didn't mean that It's just another panic attack Gotta move on but I don't know how Around you I molded myself Without you I'm just a shell It's just another flashback I can't cope with it now So before you go, wait just a minute It hurts no matter how you twist it Another breakdown imminent You'd think I'd be used to it by now Go fuck yourself, wait I'm sorry This isn't what I wanted The abandonment, all the lies It shouldn't come as a surprise
3.
When I Do 04:07
lyrics
My head is fucked I can't remember a thing Until I do and I start panicking My inner world has been stolen from me Now my fear is all that I can see I'm heartbroken So many words I've never spoken The past rewritten Coming to me in dreams and visions I can't sleep, but when I do I always seem to dream of you My head is fucked I don't remember a thing Until I do and it brings the agony The luxury of innocence has been stolen from me Living in this world where there's no place for me I'm heartbroken So many words I've never spoken The past rewritten Coming to me in dreams and visions I am stuck in the past Searching for a future, something that'll last Give me something to I can hold on to A place I can feel safe Give me somewhere I can be me And be loved just the same Give me something to hold on to Someone to keep me warm Give me something to hold on to So I can be whole I'm heartbroken So many words I've never spoken The past rewritten Coming to me in dreams and visions I haven't healed, but when I do You won't be there, to see me new Even when I know that it's not true I tell myself that I'm not scared of you The irony is lost on you I swear to god I'll see this through
4.
Do It Justice (Fire Song) 03:28
lyrics
Music is hard but I try Even though the words don't come at times I try to say what I need to say In the most poetic way I know how Ignite me so I can breath Set me ablaze so I can be free I'll be all you need me to be I'll be what you need Trying to burn bright enough I just fizzle out I want to make an impact I want you to know Music is hard but I try Even though melody escapes me sometimes I'm just not satisfied No I'm never satisfied There's a fire starting in me There's a fire starting in me But I just can't do it justice No I just can't do it justice, no I try my best to fan the fucking flames I try to keep the fire roaring But I'm afraid of judgement It's hard to open up to anyone at all There's a fire burning in me There's a fire burning in me But I just can't do it justice No I just can't do it justice, no Lukewarm at best I always second guess myself I guess it's cause I hate myself Longing for the things I never felt
5.
Broken Shirt Song 03:36
lyrics
Listening to acid bath, what will today will bring? It's summertime and the school bell doesn't ring Was happy to finally be out of that damn high school so I could spend the day writing music with you I was your rock, and you were mine I been looking at old pictures, thinking of past times You made living worth it Though you're not perfect You make living worth it with the smiles that you bring You make living worth it Though life isn't perfect You make living worth it Wouldn't trade it for a thing Met you back when I was just a kid Hadn't come out yet; was quiet and hid Look at us now, we've come so far Things have changed but you'll always be in my heart When we talk, I cherish every word The light of your smile lights up my world You made living worth it Though you're not perfect You make living worth it My dearest friend You make living worth it Even though life isn't perfect You make living worth it I love you to no end My friends make living worth it They love me though I'm not perfect My friends accept me as I am And that's all I can ask for Cuz none of us are perfect That's what makes living worth it I'm happy I share this fucked up world with you
6.
I Love Lucy 03:30
lyrics
When I need to open my mind I just call Lucy She shows me things no one else can see When I need to hear hard truth I dial her up She gets me closer to the me I wanna be I love Lucy, yes I do She gets me out and leads me through The wreckage that lays in my head It blows my fucking mind I love Lucy, yes I do She confuses me but tells me the truth Things are bright and wonderful With her in my life Lucy gives me what I need to do better As long as I take it to heart When we vibe, now and then I hang with Lucy all day long I love Lucy, yes I do With her the world is new All the lessons she's given me I'll never forget Lucy you take me down a notch Helping me retreat into my thoughts And refraction of the sunlight Or the aura of stars shining at night Lucy when I'm with you things aren't the same Fractal beauty, best kind of insane When she sings to me I see it all around Fascinating new, optical sound Lucy you can't be my cure But you help me to cope and endure I hope together we can change me for the better Even if I don't know you forever Your bittersweet presence lingers on my tongue I swallow and it's begun Come on Lucy let's have some fun Nowhere to hide for me
7.
Pale Light 04:06
lyrics
I've been waiting for a night When the stars are bright like they were That cold, white, pale light Shatters me and breaks my heart Embraced by the silence The swaying of the trees The things unknown, the things unseen Reach out their hands to me My moon eclipses The darkness looming in The little things, that time brings Won't leave my head The clarity it brings me Drives me half insane A reflection there of myself The one whom I blame I've never forgiven myself For what happened in the night The part I had to play The things that weren't alright My moon eclipses Everything that I hold dear The little things, that time brings Are all washed in red I hope you see every part of me And love me for who I am I hope you see every part me And try to understand I've never really let somebody in And not been betrayed and hurt But this feels so right, yeah I feel so right Maybe you can be my first My moon eclipses I find my peace with it My sun rises so now it's time To find the things that will never die
8.
Wax and Wane (Rain Song) 04:28
lyrics
Rain, when you shine You sure do catch my eye You and I intertwined in a love that grows by the day There's nothing but warmth where we meet I hope I show it, I hope you can see When you retreat from the world with me Loving me so gently Hey Rain, hey Rain All things wax and wane Hey Rain, hey Rain My love for you remains Rain, when you smile I feel so at peace I hope that you know how much you mean to me When we're close I feel your radiance and I rest assured, safe in your embrace Hey Rain, hey Rain All things wax and wane Hey Rain, hey Rain My love for you remains For your little ways, the little things The wax and wane, and everything that makes you who you are They all add up to something so beautiful, And I'm in love with every single part In this world of chaos and noise You're a calm and steady voice In this world of strife and grief You're a shining light to lead me home I hope you know I hope you know I hope you know I hope you know Hey Rain, hey Rain I can hardly wait to see you again Hey Rain, hey Rain It's heaven close to you Cause our little ways, the subtle things The wax and wane, and every part of who we are Together we are something so beautiful And I love every part
9.
Helping Hand (Dev Song) 04:21
lyrics
The best things in life are never planned Unexpected and right on cue Like fate lending a helping hand That brings me close to you The greatest joys often come When we least anticipate A serendipitous outcome A new light in my life A beautiful, budding love A shining light, like a new star We come together heart to heart And it's fucking magic Often the worst of times segue into the best Wouldn't you agree love? I think it's kind of beautiful How times that test our will can lead to something wonderful How times that bring us down can end in so much happiness A beautiful, budding love A shining light, like a new star We come together heart to heart And it's fucking magic Even though I endured what I did I'm so happy to have met you, Dev I just want to build you up and love you like you deserve Love you like you deserve Let you know how much you're worth Because you're wonderful Together we are beautiful A beautiful, budding love A shining light, like a new star We come together heart to heart And it's fucking magic
10.
Shattered Glass 04:11
lyrics
Crying fits when I'm just trying to sleep Days passed weighing down on me Take a hit so I can get some sleep "I can't do this, I'm in much too deep" Could I just get an answer? I'm tired of waiting I'm tired of begging for love and validation I'm tired of this toxic love Over and over I get torn apart Shattered glass, disrepair Look inside, nothings there The answer changes day by day But the feeling never really fades Shattered glass, no repair Keep it in, it's not fair The answer changes day by day But the feeling always stays Could I just get an answer? I'm tired of waiting I'm tired of begging for love and validation I'm tired of this toxic love Over and over I get torn apart Could I just get an answer? I'm tired of waiting I'm tired of begging for love and validation I'm tired of this toxic love Over and over I get torn apart I was sick of it, I was sick of it You treated me like absolute garbage You left me in another world I wish I could take back all that you stole
11.
I Can't Get Enough (Cigarette Song) 03:54
lyrics
Stamp out my fire just like you do All this time I been waiting to Tear you down just a notch So maybe you'll know how it feels You burn just like a cigarette It feels just like a hug Pleasure and pain meld together It's never ever enough So tear me apart just like you do All this time I been waiting to Feel that pain just one last time So maybe I'll know that I'm real You burn just like a cigarette And I can't get enough It hurts me so viscerally To be this in love The misery is my lifeblood I'm caught in it's throes It seems to cling to me No matter where I go You burn just like a cigarette Tender like a bruise You or my sanity I wish I didn't have to choose
12.
Soaked to the Skin 03:36
lyrics
Pulling warmth from ice and snow I just wanted you to know I'll be okay I'm sorry, I need to stop apologizing Finding peace where there is none It's already begun I'll be okay I just have to try This life is a maelstrom, lightning striking me Soaked to the skin, will someone set me free? This life is a hurricane, ruin in it's wake Past and future converge and nothing is the same I always apologize for simply existing I just want to be okay I need to stop worrying so much That you're angry with me Finding peace where there is none It's already begun I'm not okay But I can learn to be This life is a maelstrom, battered by the wind I'm trying to heal, but I'm still soaked to the skin This life is a hurricane, ruin in it's wake The past rears it's head and now nothing feels safe We all kid ourselves til we can't anymore That's when healing begins Sometimes you have to reach rock bottom To rise, to thrive, to come out on the other side This life is a fire, burning within I'm far from perfect but I do the best I can This life is a hurricane, ruin in it's wake Years have passed but I still struggle to feel safe
13.
A Different Kind of Pain 04:19
lyrics
I want to forgive you for leaving me out in the cold But the hurt of it all still lingers inside I really do want to forgive, you know How do I feel? Can't make up my mind I admire you like no other, but it just doesn't cancel out All the pain that I hold on to I can feel it in my gut Dad, your negligence broke my heart I wanted to cry out in the dark I wanted to cry out for help But I didn't think you'd come to save me I've never trusted you like I do now But this feeling of betrayal doesn't fade I love you and I want to move on From the hurt and the pain Hey dad, I'll never understand why you didn't take me with you when you left You walked out with her and I knew you weren't coming back Hey dad, it's a different kind of pain You made your choice and I wasn't saved Dad, I love you, but how didn't you see What my very own mother was doing to me The sores, the bruises, I was dying inside You could've been my savior but you didn't even try Dad, I'm trying so hard every day I know it's draining you but I don't know what to say I just don't seem to measure up It never seems to be enough You push me to do my best But what if my best isn't much? Dad, please don't leave again I need you and your love Your denial broke my heart But I still have sympathy I wasn't the only one Who got caught in the wake of her storm All the feelings that still linger Weigh me down like chains I need to move forward, Dad Can you help me find the way?

about

"Still Pissed" by Apocalypse Tourism is an emotionally charged indie album that takes listeners on a journey through the complexities of the human experience. With a mix of raw and honest lyrics, this album touches on themes of pain, heartbreak, healing, and hope. From struggles with self expression and abuse to the complexities of personal relationships, Apocalypse Tourism offers an authentic exploration of the human condition that will resonate with listeners on a deep and personal level. With a range of emotions captured, this album delivers a well-rounded and impactful listening experience that ultimately offers a message of self-discovery and resilience.

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released May 5, 2023

Seraph - Everything

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Apocalypse Tourism Fredericksburg, Virginia

Solo indie project from FXBG

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